Florence the Machine
Lynda Alan
Noelle Royer
Matt Kowalczyk
M-22
How did you come up with your derby name and number?
If you’ve never seen Florence + The Machine’s “Kiss With A Fist”, go watch it now, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tpsDegqioVA. She’s a powerful, wildly creative and beautiful bada** diva with a flair for the dramatic and a great sense of humor. Not a bad role model for any girl. Plus, one of the things I’ve got going for me is my endurance; in Flight School some of my new friends said I was “like a machine”, because I never wore out. And then I started scrimmaging and going to endurance practices with Panty Shot.
M-22 is the scenic highway, http://www.m22colortour.com, I grew up on in northern Michigan. I’m very proud of where I come from.
Why did you join TTRB?
I joined TTRB because I think it’s important to set challenging goals for yourself, and try things that scare you a little bit.
How long have you been skating?
I put on my first pair of quad racing skates in mid-August 2011. Stood up in them in the middle of the store, and immediately fell on my a**. It’s been all downhill since then.
How has derby improved your life?
I like being fit and strong and it keeps me there. It’s the only competitive team sport that I’ve ever tried and it challenges me constantly. Most importantly, it’s making me a more assertive woman who worries less and less what other people think of me – Honey Badger don’t care, and neither does Florence the Machine.
What do you do with your time, other than derby?
“Other than derby”? Haha, that’s funny. Before I started skating I was a runner, climber, and yogini; not so much anymore. I have to confess that I stink at cross-training. When I’m not skating I’m working as a marketing consultant and web content manager at Projectline Services (holla!), hitting up new restaurants with my boyfriend or girlfriends, maybe schvitzing at Banya 5.
Do you have a quote/saying that means a lot to you?
Yes! My awesome dad writes me letters and includes clippings from a magazine he reads – here’s one of the quotes I got from him that really stuck with me:
“This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrapheap; the being a force of Nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.” -George Bernard Shaw, certified bada**
If you could give any advice to a new or interested skater, what would it be?
Be patient, don’t compare yourself to a single other girl that you skate with, and remember to CONSTANTLY reflect on how far you’ve come - to balance out the negative self-talk that is so easy to get caught in, no matter what your skill level and experience may be. Yesterday, you made it once around the track without falling, and tomorrow, you’ll make it around three times. Every small victory MUST be counted – by yourself, and for yourself, no matter what anyone else says or does.
What is your biggest fear?
On the track: seriously injuring someone, or getting seriously injured myself. I’ve never broken a bone in my life so I have no frame of reference for what that pain would do to me.
Off the track: no longer being of use to the world. Man, that’s a major downer; quick, read my answer to the next question!
What makes you happy?
Being well-fed, well-rested and physically spent from some form of enjoyable exertion. Seeing my parents. Witnessing acts of kindness or compassion between strangers. Sitting in the Icicle River on a 100-plus degree day after a morning of climbing. Bear hugs. Footrubs.
What are your dislikes?
A food economy that makes so many of us fat and sick. Corporate personhood and corporate greed, which is a root cause of most of what I dislike in what humans do to ourselves and each other. Seattle’s public transportation. The word “moist”.


